Anxiety: A “Cure” for Executive Dysfunction?

Let’s talk about anxiety.

It’s often talked down upon, but it’s actually a legit strategy. Anxiety kicks us into action when we’re stuck, and it’s also self-protective.

Let’s take anxiety’s interaction with executive functioning (EF) challenges for example. In short, EF refers to planning, organizing, time management, working memory, task prioritization, motivation, momentum and so many other things.

EF challenges, when met with anxiety, can lessen or even diminish. This can save individuals from the pain of missed deadlines, among other less-than-ideal situations.

That’s a good thing, right?

It can be…for a time.

As children, the wisdom of our bodies elect strategies such as overcompensation as protection from consequences. If these strategies are practiced over time, it strengthens neural networks which increases the likelihood of holding onto these strategies. Think of it like a well-trodden path.

But, the overcompensation can add up, and show up as depression or burnout over time.

Neurodivergent individuals are especially prone to this dynamic, as EF challenges and anxiety are common among this population.

As a practitioner specializing in neurodiversity-affirming parent coaching, I feel it’s my job to at first invite parents to notice and honour this phenomenon. That’s the first step when it comes to offering support.

Next, I invite them to get curious. Inquire about the child’s internal experience rather than just noticing the external. What is it like for their child to meet all of life’s current demands?

It might be too much.

And finally, I invite them to offer accommodations and supports. This may be in the form of seeing an EF coach. It might be offering more one-to-one support at school. It might be co-creating plans and strategies.

For the anxiety piece, taking a nervous system approach is often the most important step. It’s less about what am I doing to support them, and more about the unconsious invisible conversation that happens between two bodies — that is, that back-and-forth between two nervous systems.

As a parent, how are you tending to yourself in-the-moment? How are you tuning in to your kid? This step surpasses all strategies and scripts.

Anxiety is a trickster — when it shows up, it often creates a shadow that hides very important issues. Tending to the anxiety will often reveal what’s already there, if it has a safe place to express itself.

What might it be like to be less performance-focused, and more in-tune with your child’s nervous system, moment-by-moment?

Kerry

If this post resonates with you, check out my Safe & Strong support needs workbook. This resource will help you to uncover and understand your kids needs beyond anxiety, and learn how to support them.